Remember Me
by shizuyue
Summary: [shonen ai, oneshot] Axel x Roxas, implied Axel x Marluxia. Post KH:CoM, Axel is disturbed by Namine's powers and betraying Marluxia, and troubled by the secret he keeps from Roxas.


Author's Note: Axel is disturbed by Namine's ability to manipulate memories, betraying his ex-lover Marluxia and coupled with the secret of Roxas's Somebody, he started thinking strange things.

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"After you get your heart back... will you remember me?"

Roxas looked down at the intent green eyes gazing up at him, puzzled at the question and Axel's unusually serious tone. "I have never really thought about that..."

The redhead had been acting weirdly after he came back from Castle Oblivion. Roxas had attributed it to the death of Marluxia, since Axel had once been on more than friendly terms with the pink-haired Nobody. Besides, if Demyx was so distraught with whatever emotions he supposedly felt, that the water-user was getting himself drunk for a week straight, he thought that perhaps Axel was in the same strange state.

Absentmindedly, his fingers stroke the spiky red locks that stood out vividly against his dark colored clothing from where they were squashed flat by Axel's head was resting on his thighs while the rest of the lanky Nobody's body was sprawled on the bed. "Why do you ask?"

Axel did not answer him, but spoke, "You know what the Superior says about our having no hearts and no emotions... all that stuff? Because we were born when our Somebody lost their hearts and became Heartless?"

"Yeah. He repeated it half a dozen times or so during meetings." Roxas could not help rolling his eyes at the reminder, then he frowned. "What about it?"

Axel suddenly pushed himself up and stared straight into Roxas's eyes, a delicate sort of vulnerability in his fierce gaze. "What if he really was right? That we have no hearts, no emotions... all we think we are feeling for each other are just illusions? Because without a heart where will all our feelings come from and be kept in? In our brain?"

To say that Roxas was not shocked by Axel's outburst would be a blatant lie. His blue eyes widened as he stared back at the fire-user with an overwhelmed expression. "But..."

"Even if the Superior is lying or don't know what he is talking about, and we do have emotions, and there's something that temporarily substitute our heart to keep those feelings... but what will happen if we get our hearts back? Will all my feelings for you be gone? Discarded because I will have a heart and becomes a new being? Will I forget you? What about you? Will you remember me and what we have together, or will you like another? What if..."

"I don't know!"

Roxas's sudden exclamation broke Axel's hysterical verbal flood and stunned the redhead into shutting up. The fragile look in those emerald eyes persisted for a moment longer, before it abruptly disappeared behind what had to be a mask. The usually expressive face was momentarily blank, then it morphed into a look of exaggerated surprise and remorse. "I'm so sorry, Roxas. I don't know what have gotten over me for a second there. Just forget-"

"Don't do that. Don't lie to me, Axel." With a softness that heavily contrasted to his previous yell, the blond gently cupped Axel's cheeks with his warm palms, and fixed the redhead with a pleading look. Those soulful azure of his eyes had turned into a deeper blue with sorrow and a swirl of other emotions. "If you want to, I won't ask what all that was about. I'll forget that it happened. Just don't lie to me... don't make it hard for me to trust you..."

"Maybe you shouldn't have..." With something akin to panic flickering in his eyes, Axel pushed Roxas's hands way and turned to face the wall instead of the younger Nobody. "Maybe I already lied to you. You shouldn't trust me. None of us Nobodies are trustworthy. We have no hearts, remember?"

If Roxas had been puzzled, he was completely bewildered at the moment. But there was one thing he was certain. "You never lied to me, Axel, or give me reason to not believe you. I trust you, of all people, to not lie to me."

"You shouldn't!" Axel whirled around with a stricken look and flames erupted around him in his agitation. "I may betray you! Like the way I betrayed Marluxia because he was no longer loyal to us! If you don't trust me, then neither of us will feel hurt if I betray you or forget you, or if you do the same to me! Like the way we are supposed to, because we don't have hearts! I won't have to feel like I'm an empty shell without you!"

The redhead's harsh panting was the only sound in the room, loud against the silence. Realising that he had said too much, Axel stood and was poised to either dash out of the room or head off in a dark portal, when Roxas quickly got up and wrapped his arms around Axel's waist. "Don't leave. Not like this."

"Let go, Roxas." The spoken words were soft and regretful. "I'm tired."

Roxas let his arms fall to his side, and stared down at the floor as Axel moved towards the door. "I believe... that we have something together. I don't know what it is or if getting a heart will change anything... but I won't betray you. And I trust that you won't either, Axel."

The older Nobody paused in mid-step, but he did not turn back. For a long moment, he stood there, still as a statue. Then, he finally spoke.

"I know who your Somebody is."


End file.
